Accident-free Advocate Pillows

"They protect my car from dings so it always looks great."

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Man using to much bug spray

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Getting the hang of it?"

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

"Careful."

Reasonableman

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

The Dangers of Not Getting Enough Sleep...

'In my day, we didn't concern ourselves with wimpy notions of workplace ergonomics.'

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'We don't want to risk having any injuries during spring training.'

"Here comes the super-visor."

"How would you rate your toleration for risk?"

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty

"You're right. I have to come up with a brake of some kind."

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

Drug Testing Unit: 'Uh Oh!'

The first 10,000 fans got a concussion bobblehead!

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

Boozing and Cruising

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

Knights Wing Mirrors.

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.

"Pity that 'on' button's a bit of a stretch."