Academic Study Gifts

"Those who don't study history are doomed to repeat it. Yet those who do study history are doomed to stand by helplessly while everyone else repeats it."

A to Z Publishers: 'We justify high prices for textbooks because there is zero film rights potential...'

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"Dean Williams, the grant committee approved my research grant to determine how many research grants are a waste of government money!"

George Santayana

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"Good boy."

Ethics exam cheater.

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

Flags

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

Pretty Flowers

Eternal Student.

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings