Academia Ace Gifts

'Dad. I have a paper due on international relations, so I'm going out with that cute exchange student from Spain.'

"Tests! That's one thing I don't like about the end of school. I can't believe it! You're not finished studying, either?"

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Ethics exam cheater.

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

Eternal Student.

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

'They all want to play the star.'

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

'It's all original research. I had no assistance when I looked it up on Wikipedia.'

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

Continuing education.

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

Exam

Scientists are sexy

Professor Wiles grows insufferable.

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

Now showing, at a University near you...

Calculation Board - You Are Here

"Ah, ha! The universe IS expanding! I can't find my glasses anywhere!"

Miss America IQ Pageant