Abstract Art Fan Gifts

Picasso Interviews a Prospective Model

'I don't know about art but I like the bouncing ball'.

'And this is the picture the great man painted.'

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

"It's the tomb of the unknown Sculptor."

Pass

"He's really captured the moment!"

"That reminds me, I must buy a new shredder."

'The victim has defense wounds. When the art challenged her, she clearly put up a fight.'

"My art raises complex tissues."

'It's my homage to Picasso.' (Snowman is all mixed up with eyes and nose in odd places)

Percentage artwork

Vissarion Grigoryevich Belinsky

It's very sixties.

Wagging Dog

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

Cubism Model

"He had it commissioned just before he died."

Picasso: The Early Years

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"Cat box"

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

"An unfortunate museum gift shop." "Banksy activity set." "Jackson Pollock coloring book." "MC Escher building blocks." "Claes Oldenburg miniatures." "Marceau Marceau CDs." "Seurat's connect-the-dots aaAAAAA."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Hug and Do a Chorus Line Kick.

Taking a peek at the audience

It's a call from Tate modern.

That midnight hour when fleeting memories come home to roost.

Pharaoh Cocoon

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

Jackson Pollock Studio

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

'Pray for me.'