Aborted Plans T-Shirts

Hell Mark - Cards for every occasion.

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

'I'd like to leave my pacemaker to the medical institute, my artificial lung to the research center, my false teeth to the dental clinic, my dacron arteries...'

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

"The best laid plans of mice and men... differ materially in their objectives."

'Before you begin, I'd like to thank you for coming in early to do this on such short notice.'

'Now, that's just great: We're flightless again...'

"The answer is NO!"

'...and ski conditions will be excellent on city streets today.'

'When the airport said they were booking us on a different flight, I thouoght we'd still be going to Albuquerque!'

'Oops! Maybe I should've put this sign out a little earlier.'

'I couldn't run away with you. I feel I would be depriving a village of its idiot!'

'I'm fully organized. Now I can freak out in some kind of order!'

'So! THis is what you do all day.'

'You dropped your day planner.'

"I'll drill a hole in the side and we'll be FREE!!"

"Since we can't do the Vegas bachelor party we'd planned, I'm asking you all to light a pile of money on fire to celebrate our friendship with Chris."

'We should have bought the piano first, and built the igloo around it.'

"To assume Leonard has a bucket list, you have to first assume he actually wants to do anything."

"Wait a minute ... this isn't my timeshare!"

"It's a part of the new austerity program – e now run things by paralegal."

"Could you deliver 500 pizzas over there at the sports shop? Just ask for Hank at the frisbee department."

"Of course, if this one flops we're done."

Prisoners escaping in bubbles.

'Your heart, sir, torn out, stomped on and handed back to you in a doggie bag. Will there be anything else tonight?'

"How's your digestion?"

'Here he comes!... Hide the file!'

'Even with the impact of global warming I think Timmy would be safe enough with factor 95'

hitchhiking turkey - Escaping the Holidays

"Next walk, we’re going to the park."

For use in case of wrongful arrest.

Fisherman waiting with a mallet.

"I'm using sticky notes to identify areas in my life that can be improved. This one says I need five bucks to buy more sticky notes."