Zoology Nerd Gifts

"I'm having an identity crisis, Doc. I'm an unguligrade, but I feel like a digitigrade."

Polly txt speak

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

"Sign my yearbook?"

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

Stoneage puncture repair kit...

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

Farm Humor.

The Worm Charmer

"The hyenas started it."

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

'Everybody has to change to compete.'

"Tallyho!"

God's Subcontractors

"You're worried about salmonella? We're vultures for cripes sake!"

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

"We’re a lending aquarium."

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

"Koalas when no one's looking"

"Yup, pretty sure that was a flying squirrel."