Zen Anglers Gifts

Buddha Fishing

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

Zenemies.

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

Yoga.

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

Guru.

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

"Show off."

When Buddha came to nirvana.

'Do you ever just feel like getting AWAY from it all?'

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"Hoarder."

"So you want for your three wishes...world peace, happiness for friends and family...and the weekend off."

2 + 2 = 4. 2 x 2 = 4. Oh, I get it! It's a Zen thing!

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

Man can levitate but can't hold fingers properly.

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

Zenboni

Working from OM.