Youthful Communicator Pillows

"Hi, it's me. My mum's confiscated my mobile." (Kid talks to friend using margarine tub and string).

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"I'm fascinated by body language."

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"He has the tweeting skills of a man twice his age."

"Go on, say it again, 'I love you' in Armadillo."

"Those are wonderful insights jack but we're, Looking for actual ideas."

Time for speeches

By teaching the parrot a few key phrases, Marilyn no longer needs to nag her kids.

'Of course, this social contract will have to remain hypothical until someone invents writing.'

Children playing in the street

"I've learned to give up when I hear Brooklyn in your voice."

We can do ANYTHING if we all work TOGETHER.

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'

When it comes to texting, she's all thumbs.'

"Your free-floating anxiety is floating over to me."

'The position calls for a mature person with young ideas.'

'I'm dropping you a lion.'

'This is Kevin O'Shea, my big sister's answering service.'

"Debit card, no problem. Any cash back?"

"Hey, Gramps. You believe in life after death?" "Boy. At my age I'm not even sure about life after my morning BM."

'My problems seem small to you because you're so darn BIG'

'I'm thinking about running for president. Not this term but as soon as I'm allowed to cross the street by myself.'

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

If a tweet is sent out and no one signs up to read it, does it exist? Happens millions of times a day.

"Before I read about my summer vacation, I'd like to ask that all pagers, beepers, and cell phones be turned off."

"We're offering twenty million plus incentives over a four-year period, Mrs. Morton. Can Timmy come out and play?"

"I'm sorry, but you're not the patient your father was."

"I'm gonna make this short and to the point."

'This is Jake. I'm not in now, so please leave a message...HELLO! HELLO! This is Jake! Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm just mesin' with you! I'm still NOT in!'

I think I have too many apps.

"Anything wrong, sweetie pie? You've been ignoring the tip jar lately."

Careful

"It's like you haven't heard a single thing I've thought."