Youthful Behavior Analyst T-Shirts

'You gotta try different things! Sometimes a temper tantrum works best an' somethimes sulking an' sometimes not eating!'

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

Hoodie Hang-out

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

Children arguing over the name of a fish

"My System 1 tells me she's articulate, capable, shrewd. My System 2 says BIMBO."

"I plan on keeping this off my resume!"

'We'll never understand these kids. It's the old evolution gap.'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"He's so well behaved I'm really worried, doctor."

"People are crazy."

"You have a remarkable lack of curiosity about your co-workers."

' 'Peppermint thumb' is one of our toughest cases to cure.'

Kids' energy levels

Freudian vs Behavior therapist.

'Why do I always pick the slow moving queue?'

Jane Goodall patiently gains the trust of her subjects in an unpublicized research project.

Illustration for 'Eleanor's Victory' by Miss Braddon, scene 2.

Respect Zone: 'We respect yobs.'

There's just no excuse for your behavior, Al. I thought it was your job to find one, doctor.

'All those years of teaching me to walk and talk. . . now all they want is for me to sit down and shut up!'

"We assumed they were raised by wolves, but I'm beginning to believe they were raised by stray dogs."k Upload

"Andy plays perfectly well with others - it's others who don't play well with Andy."

Sigmund Freud

Swings Doctor

'Sorry, I'm not available. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you.'

Silent Body Language

"My teacher noticed you weren't at parent-teacher night . She wanted to ask why I never take an interest in anything."

'Dad, I have commissioned my buddy to study your behavior patterns.'

Learning to read body language, lesson one: 'Leave me alone!'

"Why are they always pushing quality on us?"

"Well, obviously, I'm not an expert on how humans behave during the day, but I too have noticed a lot of anti-social behaviour around these places called bars..."

"I was fired everywhere because I have no manners. Give me some money, you b*@£%d!"