Youth Soccer Season Gifts

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

Football Fans

The trauma of losing.

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

'OK, now let's switch places.'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

So far the coaching exchange program was hitting a few snags.

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

"I got a red card for not having enough fun!!"

Tweet! Tweet! Tweet! Ok, team it's a tie. We're going into overtime. First score wins the game! Let's see your fiercest game faces! That's it! My sudden death panel!

Runt! You'll never make the team. We'll see! You can't even tie your shoelace! Great technique!

We encourage the playing of games with other children.

"And the way you kids kick ass today will speak volumes about the leaders of tomorrow you will be."

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

The young Michael Phelps: 'Just another four laps and I'll get out!'

'Nice Header, Lauren!'

Futsal

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

"I've never been into the other team's end... what's it like?"

"Can we fast forward through the 7th inning stretch?"

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

'...And remember' It's not whether your dads win or lose the fight in the stands. It's how you play the game.'

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'

'We're doing everything we can to police ourselves on steroids.'

"Look,we'll settle this on penalties, not an American style shoot out."

'Nice level swing, Billy. Just meet the ball. Don't try to kill it, Billy.'

"Would you knowingly cheat to be better at something just to make millions of dollars? Well would you? Son? ... Son?"

'I'm all the athletic support my son will ever need!'

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

Sportsmanship

Listen up, team! There will be no trash talk. No harassing the refs. No throwing elbows. Understand? Yes, coach! Ok, kids! Go play! Coach.