Youth Soccer Season Gifts

Football Fans

The trauma of losing.

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

'OK, now let's switch places.'

So far the coaching exchange program was hitting a few snags.

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"I got a red card for not having enough fun!!"

We encourage the playing of games with other children.

"And the way you kids kick ass today will speak volumes about the leaders of tomorrow you will be."

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

'Nice Header, Lauren!'

Futsal

"I've never been into the other team's end... what's it like?"

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

"Can we fast forward through the 7th inning stretch?"

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'

'...And remember' It's not whether your dads win or lose the fight in the stands. It's how you play the game.'

"Look,we'll settle this on penalties, not an American style shoot out."

"Would you knowingly cheat to be better at something just to make millions of dollars? Well would you? Son? ... Son?"

'Nice level swing, Billy. Just meet the ball. Don't try to kill it, Billy.'

'I'm all the athletic support my son will ever need!'

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

Sportsmanship

'If you think men don't know how to show emotion - just wait until one of them scores...'