Youth Hockey Pillows

Thank you for not flying into a rage and pummeling the ref!!

Football Fans

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

The trauma of losing.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

Hockey Season.

'I know I'm still in the Juniors, but I already need a therapist.'

"Remember, kids, it's not winning that matters, it's getting a clean urine sample that's important."

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

Major Bunker (who has been persuaded to join in a game of hockey for the first time, absent-mindedly preparing to drive). 'Force.'

'Still having problems finding a baby sitter?'

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

We encourage the playing of games with other children.

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

Jocko, a man for all sports' seasons.

'Lungs, normal. Heart, normal. Kidneys, normal. For the life of me, I can't figure out where your pain is coming... wait. Do you play hockey?'

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

Kids playing ice hockey for a medal.

Where the Deer and the Antelope Play...