Youth Soccer Pillows

Foosball: Youth soccer version.

We encourage the playing of games with other children.

Football Fans

The trauma of losing.

"I AM at my usual position."

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

"Remember, kids, it's not winning that matters, it's getting a clean urine sample that's important."

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'OK, now let's switch places.'

Runt! You'll never make the team. We'll see! You can't even tie your shoelace! Great technique!

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

'Nice Header, Lauren!'

Futsal

The young Michael Phelps: 'Just another four laps and I'll get out!'

"Can we fast forward through the 7th inning stretch?"

"...and then while I was at soccer practice they moved house."

"I've never been into the other team's end... what's it like?"

'...And remember' It's not whether your dads win or lose the fight in the stands. It's how you play the game.'

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'

'I'm the new kid on the team. Where's my signing bonus?'

"Benjamin, we've discovered, is quite gifted at third base."

'We're doing everything we can to police ourselves on steroids.'

'I'm all the athletic support my son will ever need!'

'Nice level swing, Billy. Just meet the ball. Don't try to kill it, Billy.'

"Would you knowingly cheat to be better at something just to make millions of dollars? Well would you? Son? ... Son?"

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

'Not right now, Timmy. First we're going to work on fielding ground balls. Maybe later we can discuss collective bargaining.'

Sportsmanship

Listen up, team! There will be no trash talk. No harassing the refs. No throwing elbows. Understand? Yes, coach! Ok, kids! Go play! Coach.