Young Learner Pillows

'I'm not going back to school any more. My smartphone knows all I need to know.'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

Having been born with a birthmark that looks exactly like Asia and the Mideast, Russell was able to ace the geography portion of the SATs.

"I'm still pre-literate."

'When they came up with a 'do your homework' app, then I'll know technology can really make life better.'

Scientist has note on chalkboard: E=mc2 + 6% sales tax.

Teacher has two boxes: "Book Smart" and "Street Smart"

"...L...uh, M...uh Q...how come there are so many darn letters in the alphabet anyway?"

Education and Apprenticeships

"Obviously, I can't fly like you, but if you teach me, I can probably sing like you..."

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

'Remind me to never again ask him what he learned in school.'

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

"And today children, Homer is going to show us his 'pressed fly and bug collection'."

'Miss, I think I've learnt all I can too.'

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

'Would it make a difference if I told you I was listening to book on audio?'

'Father, when are you going to get software for our home computer that will teach me French?'

'Where's the mouse for this thing?'

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

I see we have the same summer reading list. ABC.

Student about Biz Quick class: 'It's bite-size information in a 15 minute class that teaches you how to roll in the dough.'

Welcome to Kindergarten. It's a list of school supplies -- I need pencils, a ruler, crayons and a laptop!

University of Hard Knocks

"First buttons, then zippers, now we learn to tie our shoes. Is mom trying to tell us something?"

"Dude, I've never seen you so happy about a 'B' before."

'Pete plays truant, but keeps up with his lessons!'

Modern Studying

Moral Values for Dummies

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

'Timmy's very bright for his age. He knows nearly all his ABC's!'

'It's nice that you've learned to tie your shoes, but you're really too young to quit while you're ahead.'