Workspace Optimizer Gifts

'After considering the pros and cons of commuting, I've decided the only sane thing to do is live in my office.'

'Ms Brown, I think I need a bigger desk!'

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"It's an alert from my smart desk. It wants me to go paperless because it can no longer bear the weight of all the paper I use."

The new contract didn't leave him much room to maneuver his hoverdesk.

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

"I always like to clear my desk off for the weekend."

'We believe in using performance-enhancing drugs here.. they're called bonuses.'

"We should have taken the cubicles."

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

'It's new from British Telecom...a telephone ignoring machine.'

"Huddleston, I admire your hands-on approach to everything, but get the hell out of my office!"

"It's your cubicle, Nelson, not your coop."

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

The Move.

With the office space available, we have no choice but to believe in teamwork!

'They'll tell you this is an open office workspace, but watch out for the invisible fences.'

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

"I appreciate your contribution to our drawdown of inventory, but isn't your office getting cramped?"

'You've been rearranging the furniture again, haven't you?'

"Did I say 'corner office'? I meant 'corner of my office'."

'Thank you - but I prefer to stand.'

You're fortunate you have a cubicle. Due to cutbacks, my boss makes us wear horse blinders.

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

"I miss the old cubicles."

'Making staff get a sick note after one day is essential if we're to make the whole system work more efficiently!'

"It's a terrific space, Tony—but do you think the TV will fit?"

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'