Office Environment Optimizer Gifts

Apparently there was a lot of tension between his ergonomics and his feng shui.

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

Inout baskets.

The new contract didn't leave him much room to maneuver his hoverdesk.

'We believe in using performance-enhancing drugs here.. they're called bonuses.'

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

'Miss Pringle, I run a tight ship! What is this piece of paper doing on my desk?'

'In my day, we didn't concern ourselves with wimpy notions of workplace ergonomics.'

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

"I just figured she was holding all my calls. Turns out she's been running the company."

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

"I appreciate your contribution to our drawdown of inventory, but isn't your office getting cramped?"

'You've been rearranging the furniture again, haven't you?'

"We need a better piling system."

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.

"I finally got myself organized and unsubscribed from all those-e-mails."

'Making staff get a sick note after one day is essential if we're to make the whole system work more efficiently!'

"It's a terrific space, Tony—but do you think the TV will fit?"

Man at Fire Escape sees door with 'Hot Button Issues Escape',

"Get me someone in Apologies, someone in Walkbacks, and send up the whole Scapegoating team."

'Beautiful Balloon Company' In Trays 'Up' 'Up' 'Away'

"The mirrors really do make this apartment look bigger."

Castle Efficiency

"And these are the Andersons, our tenants."

Employer of the month...and every month.

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

The Devolution of Man

Home Business - Printer Ink.

"That's your tiny house!"