Workplace Wellness Advocate Gifts

'What does carpal tunnel syndrome feel like?'

"You caught us at a bad time, Pete. This is our post-lunch slump."

'The new health and safety rep wants to talk about our smoking policy.'

'Many of our employees are under a lot of pressure. This keeps them from getting the bends if they begin to unwind too quickly.' (Decompression chamber)

"Healthy and happy workers are productive workers!"

'Now, that's more ergonomic...'

"Oh, it's a great place to work -- but the ergonomics are crap."

"On your application, it says you have narcolepsy. What is that?"

'Who wants to help me improve morale?'

'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'

"There's less stress here since they replaced the Fica trees with marijuana plants."

"The job offers a range of opportunities including burnout, exhaustion, night terrors and emotional overload."

"As you read the financials, John...be assured that it's acceptable today for men to cry."

491 Days Without An Injury

'I hear they've named a new stress syndrome after me.'

'You're right, Haskell, I should get more exercise. Tomorrow I'm turning your office into a gym.'

'Jitters about the economy? I can safely say that is not a problem at our company!'

'When he said he was going to promote staff health and fitness and encourage a little weight loss I thought he'd be giving us gym passes.'

"My sensitivity trainer says I have to say 'good morning.'"

"This report is appalling, 70% of our staff feel overworked... are the other 30% slacking?"

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

'Not only does he suffer from anxiety, he makes everyone else suffer from it too.'

'Do you really think shoulder-to-wheel and nose-to-grindstone are valid yoga positions?'

"Push harder - I still can't see the scale."

A cartoonist at the doctor, in yoga, at home and in therapy

"It's hard to keep good people."

"What's this I hear about you not having an ulcer?"

"Our medical benefits are quite limited, basically we send you a memo telling you to take more exercise."

'It's noble of you to want to keep your employees happy, but I can't help by prescribing something for them.'

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

"It's time we discuss menopause and climax change."

Performance Management: "We decided to get rid of the stick and just use the carrots."

Susan finally becomes assertive with her boss...