Workplace Wellbeing Gifts

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

"Repetitive strain injury?...theres a lot of it about."

"Staff support"

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

'Not only does he suffer from anxiety, he makes everyone else suffer from it too.'

'Do you really think shoulder-to-wheel and nose-to-grindstone are valid yoga positions?'

A Hypochondriac's Worst Nightmare

Office Ergonomics.

"It's hard to keep good people."

"What's this I hear about you not having an ulcer?"

"No, I don't think you have 'multiple personality disorder'. In fact, I don't think you have a personality at all."

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

'It's noble of you to want to keep your employees happy, but I can't help by prescribing something for them.'

'And one and two and let change through and three and four and collapse on the floor.'

"This is what I took away from the meeting."

Performance Management: "We decided to get rid of the stick and just use the carrots."

"I don't think we can put off dealing with 'presenteeism' any longer."

'Many of our employees are under a lot of pressure. This keeps them from getting the bends if they begin to unwind too quickly.' (Decompression chamber)

Days without an incident.

"They never told us what carrying twenty times our own weight would do to our knees."

Suggestion box paper shredder.

'I hear they've named a new stress syndrome after me.'

"It's okay to just go through the motions."

a crash-test dummy is performing some affirmations before going to work

"So I can eat better here at work."

"My sensitivity trainer says I have to say 'good morning.'"

If you know that you would benefit from a 15 minute nap during the day, do your best to take one.

'What does carpal tunnel syndrome feel like?'

"Cardiac day patients?"

Office Safety.

'No, Stanworth, feeling sick of your job does not qualify you for sick leave.'

'We got here too late. All his fizz is gone!'

Healthy and happy workers are productive workers!