Workplace Sitcom Fan Gifts

Think...but keep it clean!

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"Well the good news is that after the reorganisation you'll be leading the team."

'I'm promoting you to project coordinator because you seem to have an overall view of things.'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

'Yes, can I help you?'

"I don't know if I can do 'Gilmore Girls' today. I'm not sure I'm feeling up for anything involving witty yet poignant repartee."

"It's okay to be ambitious but do you dare to pee on my tree, Jackson!"

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

"I appreciate the effort Carl, but I don't think you understand the swarm concept."

"Greetings, Earthling - Are you a worker or a drone?"

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

'We're very proud of you, Jenkins. Keep up the good work.'

'Stevens, get in here. I need a few minutes with the left side of your brain.'

"You have a killer resume, Phil, but unfortunately, we have all the dead wood we need right now."

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

'With the firm growing at the speed it has there are bound to be a few problems...'

"Of course I believe in diversity. Harlan, here, is an endangered species."

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

"I may need you to take the fall for the Swanson mess. So, goeth with pride."

'I've got an exciting new assignment for you. You're going to share one salary.'

"This just in — I no longer have a job."

"What are your other qualifications besides 'my daddy owns the company'?"

"Benign so far."

Giving feedback is a complex process.

'As we all know, the appearance of honesty is the best policy....'

'Well, this is a new low - even for you.'

'You're not being fired Jenkins. It's just that all our colleagues have booted you out of the company.'

'The good news is we're not laying you off. The bad news is we want you to take a 20-year lunch break without pay.'

"Look at them over there, looking all smug with their clients and accounts and stuff."

"Ziegler, I'm transferring you out of the energy commission!"

'hard work and more hard work got me where I am today...Not my hard work of course.'