Workplace Mystic Gifts

"I think you are meant to delegate"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

Team Leader

Businessman with in and out boxes marked: 'Hocus' and 'Pocus'

Smoke and mirrors.

"I know you think this sort of thing is nonsense sir, and I hate to prove you wrong. But according to my crystal ball, you're not going to give me the raise I'm about to ask for."

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

Inkwell Genie.

Desk trays: The Good - The Bad - The Ugly

'I think I'm decisive. Can I get back to you on that?'

'In keeping with the team approach, we've traded you for two middle managers to be named later.'

"Jenkins, come in and pull up a bean bag."

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

"Helen, is it just the accountant in me, or am I sensing a tone of wistful melancholy and a bittersweet acceptance of the unfathomable mysteries of corporate life in those numbers?"

'Remember,Riley-as soon as you clear your desk you may leave early.'

"We call out to you, please reveal yourself, oh Spirit of Innovation."

'This potion will get you promoted but I can't guarantee a bonus.'

"Things are getting desperate...we have to do something!"

Dreaming about work is not necessarily bad...unless it always occurs at work.

'That line means good managerial skills!'

"Krishnan, why is it when you enter my room there's a general absence of hope?"

'Inside healer'

'I try to encourage creativity.'

"It's face painting Friday."

Frisbee, what's this I hear about you moonlighting?

'I've never seen anyone move so freely between the business world and the spirit world.'

'I'm here to work on my company's vision.'

'Yes, it is the new printer...and yes, it works by magic.'

"most of you have met Higgins. He'll be helping us prepare for the upcoming audit."

'I'm thinking of starting a religion. What would be a reasonable initial investment?'

'Thanks for calling, Furgis. Your file was right at the top of my middle desk box.'

"Around here they want things in triplicate."