Workplace Benefits Gifts

After the latest pay bonus and benefit awards you've won, I've decided to join you on the shop floor.

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Staff support"

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

'What's wrong now?'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

'It's a lateral move, you'll now be getting all of Kramer's work too.'

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

National Boss Monument.

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

"The boss likes people with strong convictions. You're hired."

"Wake up Thomas, it's not 2020. There's no Zoom camera to turn off to hide yourself."

'Yes, can I help you?'

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

Torn-Off Mouse.

"He was orphaned at an early age and raised by two giant moths."

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

'Sorry, I can't give you a raise. However, I can offer you a splendid opportunity to share the profits.'

'And we have an employee wellness program. By not offering health insurance or sick pay, we encourage wellness.'

Concerned that she would be passed over for a promotion if management knew she was pregnant, Donna concealed the fact.

"Barlow, it's come to my attention that you've called in, 'Playing Possum' 8 days this month."

InIn by-products.

Gary misread the new policy on 'Free Thinking' in the work place.