Workout Warrior Gifts

"Exercise is the best medicine. Jump."

"Gruelling as this is, it's not a total-body workout."

'I don't do much traditional exercise. But I make sure to get my heart rate up by freaking out at the office on a regular basis.'

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

' Don't you think your taking this exercise wheel a bittoo seriously?'

Two entrances to a gym; one reads "Actual Exercise" while the other reads "Sit on Equipment and Stare at your Phone."

'Come on you fat sweaty useless ugly slob!!...Get those flabby white legs moving!!'

The Seven Second Workout

Motivation to Keep Fit.

Rowing machine attached to a desk.

'Are we having fun yet?'

'You'll be spending a little time in pilates purgatory but don't worry, those guys work miracles.'

"Remember when these were all yoga centers?"

Aerobics Class.

'What, you afraid of a little exercise?'

"I haven't burned this many calories since I forgot the brownies in the oven."

"Hop up into the jolly jumper and let's see what you're made of"

"Now on the count of three, each of you will turn, aim, and fire, all the while keeping your core engaged.

"I can defend this hill for another hour, but then I really need to get to the gym."

Battery lifting weights

"Can't talk now. Cramming for tomorrow's stress test."

'So far, I've lost 90 dollars.'

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

'Which program would you like - the use it or lose it, or use it to lose it?'

'Apparently, you've purchased another piece of exercise equipment. I think it's time I organised an intervention.'

Gondola Exercise

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

"Go ahead, Perkins. I can listen to your report and roll out my hammies at the same time."

To warm up touch your toes twenty times. No way! My cap will fall off!

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"This place is so expensive you have to be fiscally fit to get physically fit."

Running machine with pothole.

'When did you start working out?'

"My personal trainer couldn't get it through his head that my arms are too short to touch my toes, so I ate him."