Workout Wannabe Gifts

'It's really not that effective, but it's easy to store.'

'I'm here to sign up for a membership since the muscle shirt didn't work.'

'I decided it was time to be more active when my wife started dusting me twice a week.'

With exercise equipment, it goes on layaway after I buy it.

I bought a pair of running shoes, and haven't seen them since.

Clancy: Exercising

'Using your workout video as a coaster for that huge dessert tells me you're off your diet.'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Sleepwalker on treadmill

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"OK, ready to go again?"

Woman walks her dog on a running machine.

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

"Here's to wellness—women's wellness!"

Robber on treadmill

Strive to win!

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

Health Nut with a 60-Pack

James's Mayfair Gym - Punting Machine.

'...but you can't keep imagining you're going downhill!'

"Do you have a motorized one?"

The trick to losing weight is to eat a small portion and wait 10 minutes. By then your resolve has caught up with your appetite!

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

'Doc, I'd like you to meet my personal trainer. This should explain a lot about my medical situation!'

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

'Been working out?'

Executives exercising

I'll take this one here.

I've been doing sit-ups!

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

'... And this is the home gym, where we hang all our clothes.'

'Good luck son, but genetically you are screwed.'

Well there's something you don't see every day...

And when you give up using this to exercise, with the option keyboard it easily converts into a harpsichord!