Worklife Strategist Gifts

'This new 'mentoring' policy is a wonderful idea...It gives staff the chances to take on significant extra responsibilities in relation to staff support and supervision.'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

Busy Workload Today and Especially Tomorrow

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

Working Late

"It looks like the 'because I say so' has it."

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

Do you have any other skills?

"Bob doesn't do well in job interviews, so he hired me. I'm a professional actor who specializes in these situations."

'And finally. . . where do you see yourself on the food chain 5 years from now?'

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

Senior Partner works at a desk, sign on wall behind her says 'Ms. Davis senior partner - formerly: 'Hey You'.

'Ever feel like you've walked into a corporate lion's den?'

'You are a self-starter... problem is, you never finish anything.'

Speed of assimilation VS New team members

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

"How have you managed to keep your job?"

"I have an obligation to the stockholders, not the employees!"

'I tried that approach once, but my employees seized the carrots and attacked me with sticks.'

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

'Thanks for the promotion offer but I was hoping to sleep my way to the top..'

'I must say, I do like your incentive program.'

"You will bargain away what little integrity you have left for what little job security you can gain."

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

"I have good news and bad news, Tom. The good news is good for me. The bad news is bad for you."

"Remember when everyone told you this job would lead you nowhere? Well, you've arrived!"

'Henry has found his niche with us.'

'It's a difficult position to fill. Someone who's smarter than me - and smart enough to pretend not to know it.'

"Yes, I'm sure you do deserve further career advancement. But if I promote you again you'll have my job!"

"The itsy-bitsy spider went up the corporate ladder. And he didn't care how many lives he ruined along the way. I know, this isn't the book Simon & Schuster wants. But it's the damn truth."

'I'm sorry you had to wait. My Time Management Workshop started late.'

'Little has changed since you called saying you had to work overtime. Except John Wayne died. Oh, and there's a new thing called the 'Internet'.'