Working With Kids T-Shirts

'Truthfully, I love teaching middle-school kids, they're so interesting!...They're all just pudgy bundles of potential!...Although some of them smell funny.'

'Another day another dollar Maurice, but boy do I hate kids!'

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

City Zoo: Day Care

I like the Jets...I guess

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

Wildlife

Santa Claus's Mail

'Ahhh...'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

No caption (A young bald eagle plays a claw game full of fish as his parent stands behind him).

'Chocolate milk, carrot cake,candied yams...see, there's a solution to everything!'

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"How is it that someone who reads all the Harry Potter books still doesn't know the magic word?"

'Still having a hard time finding day care?'

"We're playing doctor. Do you have any old magazines for our waiting room?"

'Don't look at me. I'm not the one who puts the measuring cups where I can't reach them.'

"And this is our media room."

"Look, a bug!"

Boy with a whale: 'He followed me home, Dad, can I keep him?'

'He made an excellent jelly.'

Updated Nursery Rhyme #27.

Shed Into Dream Playhouse.

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

"That'll be five bucks."

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

SALE

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"Mom probably wouldn't buy us one, but you have to learn to make your own choices, Dad."