Workaholic Humor Gifts

Lunch break.

"The farm is only looking for someone part-time, no more than 80 hours a week."

'I've always been so busy, I've never taken the time to stop and smell one.'

"If you work real hard and are willing to put in the hours, the sky's the limit."

Phil, I'm just too depleted to function. I need to take the afternoon off and recharge my batteries.

'I wish you'd stop bringing your work home with you.'

'I question his commitment since his ulcer isn't bleeding.'

"Your wife's back again Dennis."

"Businessman's lunch today, Sir?"

Man tries to plug himself in for a recharge.

Working at the office. Working at home.

'Must you always be thinking about work?'

'I was so surprised when I took a break and went home. My six-months old son is now two, my wife divorced me, and my dog died.'

"A funeral service? Net week? Sorry, I'm way too busy and my diary is full. If only you'd asked me four months ago!"

"I wish you wouldn't keep bringing your work home with you."

"This may be past it's use-by date."

"When was this bed last serviced?"

Accountants on holiday

"Tim, you seem to have spent days without a break, you need some fresh air. Why don't you go and pick some litter in the car park."

'Are these billable hours?'

"I warned you - if you marry me, you marry the company."

'Darn it Mother! I'm not MISSING! I'm just working DOUBLES this month!'

"He's just now passing beneath the triumphal arch."

Look here Watson, everybody has to retire sometime!

"The doctor can deal with you now, he had to sedate your wife to stop her laughing."

Stop it, slow down...

'Hillary, I'm suffering from burn out...time for me to get back to work.'

'Miss Barnes, cancel my appointments. If I start swimming now, I can be back in the office in a few weeks.'

"I tried to close his computer and he snarled at me."

"You get addicted to the overtime."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."