Work Review Gifts

'You're somewhere between how good you think you are...to how bad I know you are.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

Burning the midnight oil.

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

Work Parfait

'Is that the sweet smell of success or some imitation air freshener?'

"I'll wait a moment for everyone's energy drink to kick in."

Man at desk with two in-trays reading 'urgent' and 'too late'.

Multi-tasking.

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

'Pssst! Straighten up, here come the bigwigs.'

Some days at work can be more challenging than others.

Busy Workload Today and Especially Tomorrow

Back to work...

'We like your zip-a-dee. You need to work on your dooh-dah.'

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

"Would anyone like to question my downsizing proposal?"

'Did you just show your teeth at me Wilson?'

"We need to change, but WHEN?"

I'm not making enough money to like you.

"My favorite way to start the day...coffee, danish, and a data dump."

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

Presentation: Thinking each other are idiots.

'If sales don't improve incrementally... our business outlook will change excrementally...'

'Not bad, Ms. Newborn. But take another crack at it, and this time remember that 'earnings-per-share' is the alter upon which all other numbers are sacrificed.'