Wordplay Warrior Gifts

"The Langmore Regional High School Inner Debate Team"

Fire Ants.

'He's our hedge fund manager.'

"Come down here, Wilson, we need to talk about your reading comprehension."

'Will Smith for food'

"I'm not fishing, I'm hunting."

"Trust me, they get a lot more forgetful when it comes time to pay their tab."

"Dichos are bits of cultural wisdom that reflect upon life as it happens. Superstitions are magical rituals that fill a gap when knowledge fails. 'Even the best cook blackens her pot' is a dicho. Eating eggs with whipped cream before a big test is a super

Military Solution to Last Week's Puzzle

'I,N,F,O,R,M,A,T,I,O,N, why do you ask?'

The Physiciatrist...

"Elective surgery? But I'm not even registered to vote!"

Math 2B- Shakespeare, yes or no?

'Something to wet the pallet, Sir?'

"He has Attention Surplus Disorder. I suggest putting him in the back of the room."

Border Collie

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

"Well, well, well—look who brought a taco to a burrito fight."

Eat Bacon. Loose weight.

'...and words can often hurt me.'

Oman Sized Tissues.

Lawyers Playing Tennis

'It's a nasty bug that's going around!'

'When you said you were doing a slow burn I thought you meant acid reflux.'

Consignia - new name for the Post Office

"They say he's a man of many parts."

That's awesome! You're amazing. She loves me. She loves me knot.

Those who say you can make order out of chaos are lousy at anagrams.

Hey, loser. I am not answering to that. You are too, you bumbleheaded dunder-dope. Hold on. You hold on, you slack-jawed half-evolved double-decker dork. I will allow you to settle for loser. I won't negotiate my own insult!

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

School. That vocabulary quiz was hard! Did you know how to use "gruesome" in a sentence? It was simple. "The gardener likes flowers so he gruesome."

I lied to you about my age. Can you guess which way? Unconvincingly?

"You're a fool, Carl - a fool and an idiot."

"Gimme a WhisKee."

"I spy with my little eye, something beginning with... N.."