Wooly Philosophers Pillows

'I can't wait to be shorn of all this wooly symbolism.'

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

'...and I only have eyes, for ewe...'

Pachyderm insomnia.

“Typical, first we lost our winter fuel payment, and now our woolly jumpers!”

'Happy now?'

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

'If you can't sleep...imagine you're at work.'

'Sure, have some wool to keep your eggs nice and warm...'

Genetic Manipulation

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

'Thanks girls: Boy it's cold today!'

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

"Do you or do you not have any wool, and if so, how many bags full?"

"Wow, you're right, Alpaca Wool is very nice against the skin..."

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

"Your father helped me, too."

"I knew it was just a matter of time before the sheep hit the fan."

My feet were cold.

'How'd the negotiations go? Take a wild guess.'

"We quickly realized it was fruitless trying to compete, so now we work together and sell blended wool..."

Shorn sheep gets Baaaaard!

'Every year I say, 'Just a little of the top' but they never listen.'

'The wool is virgin - it's none of your damn business about the sheep!'

Will work for grass

"Great, just great! School photos are tomorrow..."

" know a bargain when I see one!"

One of their favourite games was to pull the wool over their eyes.

"It's raw, unprocessed wool."

'Well yes, I suppose it is a multiple-choice question'

A Cat is Kicked Out of A Yarn Shop.

Fleeces for sale