Witty Traveler Gifts

"Probably shouldn't have finished off the saltines."

Carefree luggage.

Transylvanian backpackers.

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

Laughing Zone Ahead

Camping holidays in the British summer.

'I'm going to give you something for your depression - it's an airline ticket to the Bahamas!'

'Ms. Hatton, take a letter, a number and a hike...'

"Yipeee!"

Steve found himself on his travels.

"You have arrived at your destination."

"All the other passengers have collected and gone so well just have to admit they're ours!"

In 1682 in a remote cave in the Ural Mountains, Heinrick Glaston discovers irony.

'It's a surprise for my husband, he isn't going.'

Stonehenge Imitation

"The whole thing's much smaller than it seemed on TV."

'I'm worried that my crippling anxiety is going to shorten my life.'

"We saw the Great Wall and lots of pagodas, and I have a transplanted stomach."

Build a better mousetrap and the IRS will beat a path to your door.

"My Dad told me not to make the same mistakes he did. That doesn't leave much left!"

Mechanics price list.

One Way/Two Ways.

'Ignore him - philosophers will do anything to attract attention.'

'Oh look! We must be coming into land at Heathrow.'

"Smile!"

Never judge a nose job at face value.

'No, I'm afraid we're dull. But we do have two vacancies in the Kitchen.'

Holiday photos.

'I hope i did leave the faucet running so the water will put out the fire from the stove I left on.'

'Maybe our health insurance people aren't sticklers.'