Witty Humor Pillows

'Dear Oscar, such a dry sense of humour.'

Oil Change

Under Canvas

Jump The Queue

Postbox

'Whoooa,MAN,check out this STORM! It's PELTING down!'

'Guy comes up with one interesting theory about special relativity, suddenly he thinks he's freakin' Einstein,'

Nature is going crazy! Extremely hot summers, tornadoes, floods. . .and now Frank comes home sober on a Friday evening at 10 PM!

A lady playing piano and a man talking to her

"I love this time of year."

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

Arabic Thief Salad - lashings of whipped cream...

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

Heart To Heart

"It doesn't look much like a 'witty painting' now, does it sir?"

'Twigs... great, that'll be comfortable.'

'I'd like an 'Innuendo' please - a big one.'

'How many husbands have I had? Do you mean excluding my own?'

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

The tree of liberty can survive only so much grafting.

Spiv

Whipping Cream

Is this your father, little guy? No, lady, my father is a libel attorney, and you'll be hearing from him.

Do you believe in money at first sight?

"You have a lot of unresolved anger and it's settled in your hat."

Edwina momentarily considered sarcasm. . .

People want as much government as they deserve.

"Hey, David...what's a five letter noun for someone I couldn't live without...oh yeah, kitty!"

Tom Bowler

"He's a good boy, but he sheds like crazy."

"Well, it's only one glass after dinner darling!"

"Can I have a knife and fork, please."

'you should know my wife thinks I'm stupid.'

David Letterman

"Once you get past the divine right of kings, I'm not much into theology."