Witty Conversations Pillows

'-are your ears burning too?'

"I've always feared this day would come. I'm running out of snarky replies."

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

Crow and fox

"Darling, do you ever worry that we're becoming some sort of Merchant-Ivory production?"

Happy Hour 5-7. (Not really an hour, not really happy.) At last, truth in advertising.

"Are we ‘still working’? No, we’re still eating. You, however, are ‘still working’—now get lost!"

Jokes machine.

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

'I understand you know how to treat a woman.'

The Algonquin Round Table

'Mom can I have another apple?'

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

Heart To Heart

The Gilmore Girls

"So, what is your star sign?"

"Virginia Woolf meets 'Car Talk.'"

"Tell her I'm exercising my twenty-first amendment rights."

When Stupid People Get an Idea

Bat out of Hell

Cold caller.

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'According to my Dad, bosses are just like headmasters. The only difference is that they give you money every month.'

'How many husbands have I had? Do you mean excluding my own?'

Quizzo tonight! Win a tee shirt! Trivia is my middle name, but I have all the tee shirts I need. So, tell me something: Are there Quizzo groupies?

"Tom, we've started a little office pool on how long it'll take me to get your job. Want in?"

"Your Honor, I would like the record to state that Mr. Katzman is a 'hostile witness'."

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'

"Try the fish. It's brain food"

Edwina momentarily considered sarcasm. . .

'My favorite position? Chairperson of the Board.'