Wit And Humor Enthusiast Gifts

'How come when you're right it's female intuition and when I'm right it's dumb luck?'

'Second place goes to Dr. Howard Meyers, heretofore known as 'Not the Brightest Guy in the World.''

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Police Feline Unit

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

Cariactures

Faster, Georges, faster!

Do Not Resuscitate

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Selling lemon latt�

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

'Cannonball!'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

Here and There Trays