Wise Beings Pillows

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

Saguaro Cactus Regrets.

The older I get, the more introspective I get, or is that retrospective?'

"Tia Carmen, did you ever wish summer was over...so you could be in school?"

K9 Literati.

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

"To listen to your instincts, press one."

Lost and Profound.

Wherever You Go, There You Are - Next Exit.

"Things will get bad... then there will be an election... then things will get worse."

'Let's have some fun - Let's order from that place that guarantees pizza delivery in thirty minutes!'

"I thought I'd be lonely at the top."

'Wow! - Your diary is even more boring than MY diary!'

"Like my old man used to say: 'No news is bad news not yet undelivered.'"

"Time heals all wounds. It also kills every living thing."

The Meaning of Life

KEEP YOUR FRIENDS CLOSE AND YOUR ENEMIES CLOSER, 'That kind of thinking leads to marriage.'

'Sometimes I think about getting away from all this and get a job as a cab driver in New York city...'

On Holiday

"You should do something brilliant, before it's too late."