Wisdom Of Age Pillows

"If I had a penny for every dollar I had, I'd have two cents."

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

Saguaro Cactus Regrets.

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

"Tia Carmen, did you ever wish summer was over...so you could be in school?"

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

Senior PGA Moment.

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

Psychologist is SHOCKED by what his elderly patent is telling him.

"To listen to your instincts, press one."

Wherever You Go, There You Are - Next Exit.

The Meaning of Life

"Things will get bad... then there will be an election... then things will get worse."

"Like my old man used to say: 'No news is bad news not yet undelivered.'"

Mall of ages

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

Balding Autumn Tree.

"I thought I'd be lonely at the top."

KEEP YOUR FRIENDS CLOSE AND YOUR ENEMIES CLOSER, 'That kind of thinking leads to marriage.'

'Let's have some fun - Let's order from that place that guarantees pizza delivery in thirty minutes!'

"Seventy-five isn't the new anything."

"More aphorisms, please!"

'Enjoy it while you can, kid...one day you wake up and you're five!'

'Are you our new glue-ru?'