Wisdom Buff Gifts

"I know so much that I don't know where to begin."

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

At the Museum

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Albert Einstein

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

Apples for sale

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

'Some of those youngsters have come up with a terrific new idea - feathers.'

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

Jean-Paul Sartre

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

"To paraprase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure with out pain au chocolat."

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

Fusion Lab. Did you tell the boss we need more hydrogen? Yes, I told him we were out of our element.

God Sneezes Out Creation

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"Personally, I'm a doer."

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

Before the Internet

'I don't see why I have to pick it up. I'm not responsible for the law of gravity.'

"Yes, one is a dog."

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

"Nice epic battle between good and evil!"