Wireless Communications Gifts

"My email is down... talk to me."

Lynching on social media

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'How fast can you hype?'

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

Right click for yes...

This Message Has No Content

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

"You know, there are other emojis."

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Text Culture

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

"Bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark"

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

Obsession with the Internet.

WiFi Signals

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

'Answer these constituents letters. Tell them to go to hell in a nice way.'

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."