Winter Gift Pillows

"He's made our of mud. Since it hasn't snowed, I had to improvise."

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Daughters on the beach

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

"That'll be five bucks."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'It's okay, there's a trampoline under the snow.'

Christmas Presents.

Santa called but you were out!

"I might just get a pie."

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."

A couple looks at posters of Rio, Paris and Tokyo, all of which feature skyscrapers.

"Not much in the way of loot, but we got a ton of store credit."

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

'We always like to give more bling for the buck.'

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

When Tia Carmen says... "It's time to eat healthy!" it means... "I'm only using one stick of butter instead of three."

"Ticket and passport, please."

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

'If executive bonuses are outlawed, only outlaws will have bonuses.'

Loopholes