Window Repair Guru Gifts

'I'm from the odd shaped glass supply company.'

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

'Well, in the hands of my husbnd it's almost as lethal as a loaded gun.'

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

"Turn down the bass."

Problem Solver Wanted

Bob's DIY Store

"Then I'll huff and I'll puff..."

"Uh...not to be bossy, but I wouldn't do it that way."

"No, it's not a Rorscach test, it's a really nasty damp patch."

"So that's how you fixed things before there was Duct tape."

'This time you hold the nail!'

"A little high and inside."

'I guess I should have paid the foundation bill.'

'No worries son, I'll manage with my saw until my hammer turns up.'

Holes in pots, cigars and the road.

"Thanks for helping us put up the shelf, 'Utility Belt Man'."

"Everytime he closes a door he opens a window. He's obsessed with airflow."

Attack of footballs.

'Duct tape.'

"You have reached technical support...your call is important to us so please stay on the line..."

"The bed sheet rope made me think plant hanger and then window treatment. It all just started coming together."

"Phone my wife and tell her she can buy that new car!"

"I can't get the thingamabob to connect with the whatzadoodle. Who should I call?"

"You may have an MBA, but I can change a light bulb."

"It's one of the finest examples of a window I've ever seen!"

F**k This Old House

"Gee! It must be great living next to a golf course!"

'Be reasonable Madam - I can't get it repaired by the time your husband gets home tonight...'

Replacing a rubber fanbelt with a leather belt.