Wildlife Satire Pillows

"Oh, yes, sir, the zebra is fresh."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"Happy Gnu Year!"

"Eat me"

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

"Too much concealer?"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

'Pray for me.'

Giraffe Portrait

'You know, after a long hard winter, I just HATE eating out of cans.'

'Humans do it, why couldn't we? Instead of chasing food, we could breed it: It's all explained in my report...'

'I wanted a change in decor.'

Crow and fox

"Everything looks real good...except these long gaps in your work history every winter."

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

"Don't worry, it's not rabies: It's normal for me to foam at the mouth..."

The different taste regions on a blue whale's tongue.

'...And if that doesn't work, grab your rifle and start blasting away.'

'You're not alone, Mr. Scrapp. A lot of hyenas are sensitive to laughter in the bedroom.'

'I didn't have time to hunt'

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

"Fasten your seat belt."

Man sees half-eaten 'Do Not Feed the Bears' sign

The polar bear's vending machine.

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

'I don't see how you can breathe through that thing - it's so small!'