Wig Collector Pillows

"Might as well just embrace it. It's who we are."

Man going into bowl hands toupee to umpire.

Bob knew it was going to be one of those bad hair days.

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

Lady in a pretty dress

A man taking a bow

Silly wig.

"A man in my position makes enemies..."

Cow's straw

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

'I don't know...they all look like cows to me.'

Milking the Cow.

"My doctor said I'm not getting any younger. I'd like a second opinion."

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

"It's nice but I'm starting to think we should just wait for his real hair to grow in."

"With strong winds battering the country, the Met Office have issued an amber wig wearers warning."

Posh Easter Egg

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Express Barber Chair. 10 Hairs or Less

Mummy?!

Comedy School: 'Please knocky nicky nooo!'

'That's nothing...I've been told my wig takes fifteen years off me.'

'Do you mind if I take a straw?'

"I don't care what you think: it's cool, it's sexy, and I feel totally empowered."

'Please restore all toupees to upright position.'

"It's lost all meaning in the steroid era."

'I'm doing like you said and not drinking straight from the carton.'

'Not another copycat accident?!?! That bloody nursery rhyme's got a lot to answer for.'

'How long have you had that toupee?'

Free Range Cows.

"I thought I'd try a Marie Antoinette for a change."

Backdoor

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

Hen Behaving Badly.

"That's just UDDER NUN-sense."