White Noise Enthusiasts Gifts

"On the other hand, the constant gurgling sound helps us sleep."

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'

'I'm going to drag my sled up and down the sidewalk until the noise drives nature crazy and it snows.'

Future garbage truck driver.

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

Non-violent Western (Cowboys with water pistols).

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

'You haven't heard anything yet!'

Sea Horse outside saloon

Wake the eff up with the official New York City alarm clock. Choose your distress signal: car horns, sirens, barking, heat pipes, mouse feet. Guaranteed to disturb!

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

"You know damn well what noise!"

'Why's the sky so high?' - 'So the birds don't bump their heads.'

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

"Threatening to call the Noise Abatement Society isn't being very romantic, Sydney."

Library Grand Opening

"Turn down the bass."

'I don't like it... It's too quiet.'

"Vuuuuuuuuuuu!"

Playing dustbins

"The sea waves on my sound machine are attracting a following."

"In this one, I can hear the sound of traffic."

"Now that's what I call a sound system."

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

A question you can't ask at a football game - 'Has anyone lost their keys?'

Ambulance Paramedic making the 'Nee Naw' noise.

"No one knows his identity. He just turns up, cuts your grass, then departs without leaving his name. They call him the Lawn Ranger."

"There goes 'ol Slim ridin' off into the sunset."

'Please. Don't get me started.'

"Mmm... now WHERE did i leave my radio..?"

Communication