Whiskey Explorer T-Shirts

'What, no Johnnie Walker Black?'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

Low-Energy Drinks

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Join me in a Martini?

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

Wine taster with mineral water

'Malty tasking.'

Rugby Players and Supporters Essential Supplies

Runner 007 is given a martini for refreshment.

Fount of eternal youth/brewery.

'Not only was the superbug immune to antibiotics, but it had developed a taste for Dr Jones' whisky.'

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

Wine of the Day Club

Milton wonders if it would be possible to substitute scotch and sex for tea and sympathy.

Anton's Bar and Grill

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

California Beverages Map

"Whiskey...Leave the bottle."

'Whiskey and splash, sir.'

What's your most popular drink? Why do you want to know? Why base your order on what other people are buying? Don't be a follower. Be your own man. If you're unfamiliar with a drink, ask what's in it and decide for yourself whether that sounds good. Or better yet, live a little. Take a risk. Choose a drink you've never had at random and see where it takes you. You only have one life. Don't live it following in the footsteps of other people. That's kind of harsh. No, it's the name of the drink.

"Nice try, but I don't think whisky counts as an 'essential medication'."

Complaints Desk

'Well,we had a good run.' - Worldwide Hops Shortage.

Which Hogwarts house are you?

"So much for that vintage!"