Whimsical Parent Pillows

'Sleep tight - don't let the bedbugs bite!'

"He'll deliver his own toys this year."

"I can't right now. I have to pick the kids up then eat them."

"Yes, there will be questions but you're unquestionably the nation's most badass mom."

Baby Hairstyles.

Kangaroo with multiple pockets for lots of children...

'... Well, I don't know where your Daddy got that idea. I have plenty of brand new bikes in my workshop.'

"Jim was a model Dad".

'Can I keep him? He followed me home.'

'Daddy says 'meow'.'

'Don't worry he doesn't want any. he's allergic to everything except straw stuffing.'

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

'Bad luck duck - he's on your side of the bed.'

'Are we there yet?'

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

Children in fancy dress on the way to music lessons

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

"Where's your nose?"

Fat Kid 14- Gets re-animated

'It's nice to go hiking together. It gives us a chance to compare notes and figure out what the kids are plotting!'

'Now, you've been naughty, you're in time out! I'll turn you over in five minutes!'

"I can hardly wait for him to start leading a life of quiet desperation."

'That kid! He forgot it again!'

"Yeah, he's very like his father isn't he?"

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

"Geese fly in a V, son--attorneys fly in a wedge."

"Sorry I'm late with my grades. I was busy removing the 'Honor Roll' bumper sticker from the car."

'I'm here, Mom, hanging out with some friends.'

'He followed me home. Can I keep him, mum? Can I?'

You and your alternative pregnancy.

'Well, by golly! Martha's right, I did make those doors a touch too low.'