Whimsical Learner Gifts

"Today, in Metalwork, we learned how to cut a slit in the heads of screws."

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

Swan Fairy Tales

Lactose Intolerant

'Are you made of sugar?'

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

Dogs and their thoughts

"Little help?"

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

"Okay, that's enough Physics for one day. Take a break and chase your tails."

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

'Fetching is a good thing...but there can be TOO MUCH of a good thing.'

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

"Yes, one is a dog."

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

Spring Training

"Scuba cow"

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

Giant using sheep as cotton buds

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"