Whimsical Couple Pillows

"Till death do us part? Does that mean by natural causes, or would an accident count?"

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

Spring Training

"Push harder - I still can't see the scale."

Jack in the Box

'Your future looks charming.'

(First signs) (A half loaf of bread, ... a jug and a half of wine, and thou beside me.)

"And you wanted to throw me back."

A thief steals a heart

"My fella was chucked out of the water-birth for running around the pool and bombing."

"What lucky stranger's hitting the jackpot tonight?"

"The secret of our relationship? Easy. She just acts as if I don't even exist."

"I got you some flowers..watered them, too.".

CFL bulb and ice cream cone fall in love

"I'd better not eat any more broccoli. I'm saving room for spiritual food."

'The oceans are vast, yet we never go anywhere!'

Bird plucking a cello

"He's my escort, and he's a teddy bear."

"You know that on-line romance you've been carryin' on? Well this here's Samantha!"

A man with heart shaped head singing to a fuzzy flying heart

'Tortoise stampede! But finish your picnic, folks - plenty of time.'

'Use a tissue, dear. There's an icicle on your nose.'

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

Angels' Band: Balloons holding up a guitar.

Female sock walks away from male sock, saying: 'Look, it's just a trial separation, OK?'

"It's not you....it's me...parrot...he doesn't approve..."

"I want to make it with you."

"Oh, he's a darling alright: he gets up early every spring and gets me a freshly brewed coffee for when I wake up...

'Have any of you guys seen a crap magician with a magic top hat?'

Fish king swimming around his bowl!

'And they lived happily ever after - well beyond their means.'

'That holiday I booked for my wife to the Galapagos Islands? She found her way back, so can we try another destination?'

'Don't listen to anyone. I think you're beautiful...even if you are a weed.'

' You're not going on the at risk register just because granny's got big teeth.'

'The answer is yes - I'll sign your pre-nuptial agreement.'