Western Movie Critic Gifts

'This time you won't shout 'whoa'!'

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Billy. The Kid.

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

"Shootout at the Soapy Canal"

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

Nun Fight.

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"Waving the hat keeps the cattle moving and lets my hair get some highlights."

"It's nice to feel wanted though, isn't it?"

'OK, let's see who's going to be the pack horse today: Heads or tails?'

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

The Comfiest Hombre in the West

Historic Bank Jobs.

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

Crossing the Nachos Grande

"Head for the carrousel! It's our only chance!"

"You funnin' me, bub?"

Roland, the schizophrenic cowboy.

Opera Singer Looking Out of Place Sitting On The Bar Piano

Draw!

The embarrassment of mistaking a salon for a saloon.

Old West Bounty Hunter.

"...you mean this is the end of the 3 bandidoes?"

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

'Mama! Aliens.'

"Uh-oh it's happening aain, the feeling I'm being triggered...."

'And what makes you think this is hostile terrain, Hank?'

"I can't talk louder, I'm a little horse."