Welfare System Gifts

'You look nervous, kid.. this your first time?'

'The great thing is, the poor won't be able to squander it on luxuries such as dignity, equality and hope!'

'Not a word to Alfred, but the spare bedroom is worth losing the fourteen pounds!'

"This is why I want you to remember the three most important words in the world: spay, neuter, adopt."

'We need people who dream the impossible dreams - like pensions and health care.'

Dolestart - A New Initiative

Social Worker

'Every year local authorities whinge on about needing more money to maintain services.'

"The government is adamant that a policy of removing income support from lone parents with children over 7 is in the best interests of the treasury."

"I suppose you're worried about your little peasant benefits."

"Welcome to Alabama. Pro-life at birth; not so much after that."

Throwing out baby with the bath water.

Victim of Sequestration!

"This is your social worker Mrs Bigworth, she's brought your care package."

"But on my claim form, it definitely says Universal credit..!!"

'... And how long has your civil list been frozen?'

"Hi, I'm on the scrounge"

Iain Duncan Smith: Welfare reform

"Hi Ho Hi Ho It's to benefits we go..."

"I always choose immediate gratification over vague rewards at some unspecified time in the future."

"I thought I'd done everything to get a decent pension..."

'And finally before I can permit you to shop in this store, have you ever raised your voice to a member of staff on any prvious occasion ?'

Paris-ites

Kids and the economy

'...and there's the DSS!'

"The benefits agency is always willing to be flexible...but only under certain limited clearly defined circumstances."

'You lot are wrong - he's fit enough to get back up there!'

'What have you got on how to apply for Government handouts?'

'You got yourself a job? -- Don't you care what happens to me?'

Food stamps: 'The boss said we didn't need a union, he'd take care of our retirement.'

'Let's see - I'll need better education and healthcare. . . did I mention I can't afford any of this.'

'The alarm didn't go off, my car wouldn't start, missed the bus, my back's aching, haven't had a raise in two years ...'

"It's no use making all that fuss - there's no such thing as attention seekers allowance."

'Social security benefits are raising ... but the system's runnin' out of bread.'