Weed War Veteran Gifts

'Well, that's the gardening done - until the perishing things spring up again!'

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

'First weeds of spring.'

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

"When I heard they legalized weeds, I wanted to be first on the block to let my lawn go."

'The highest court in the land.'

Getting Rid of the Cure

'Say, aren't those the same weeds that came up last year?'

'After a hard day hunting, I relax by working my patch of green stuff.'

'Whenever he stares out the window like that I know he's about to go into a gardening frenzy.'

Lawn mower - must get longer cable

"I've found the lawnmower!"

"It's a victory garden. And the weeds have won."

"It came... it grew... it made Nana say bad words... 'Ow! You rotten #@!!×!' The invasion of the thistle"

"Say, Bill, how's that new crop of yours doing?"

'He's so proud - We've got the best collection of weeds in the street!'

'He kept saying, I'm sick of weeds. I'm sick of weeds until he got sick of weeds.'

"Look what I found. You wouldn't believe the things that people throw out."

"You, my tenacious weed, are trespassing!"

"If you ask me, you can't go wrong with this beautiful bouquet of marijuana."

"I was trying to grow roses, but I got hit by the 'bluebonnet' plague."

"You could say I'm a war veteran. I'm a retired junior high teacher."

"Ruddy Japanese knotweed gets EVERYWHERE."

"A garden is a thing of beauty and a job for ever."

Welcome to the Garden of Weedin'

"You've got to help me, Tom... my garden is out of control!"

Garden Pest Solutions

"Remind me, is this medicinal or recreational weed?"

'You were right - it's shallow rooting but spreading'

Whack Your Alarm Clock

Weod Monath (Weed Month) The Saxon word for the month of August.

Natural Regeneragtion Area (weeds).

Seed packet reads: EASY GROW JAPANESE KNOTWEED