Wedding Witticism Lover Gifts

"Until the weapons of mass destruction are found."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

"What do you mean, there's no room for my stuff?"

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

'No, but thanks for asking.'

'We were made for each other.'

"Hold on—I'm getting information as to why these two should not be wed."

"Erm, I don't think it meant just before the ceremony!!"

"We'll be single again in Heaven, right?"

'Who has the rings and prenup?'

Barry's fear of commitment crops up again.

'Psychoanalysis is passé. I suggest we ask for asylum in France.'

'Do you Margaret take Charles to be your etc, etc, etc...just hit the 'I agree' button.'

'And do you, Leslie Farnsworth promise to stop wearing camouflage so that your wife will know where you are?'

"His note says the bachelor party was so great, he's decided to remain a bachelor."

'Do you promise to love her in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, until one day she decides to bite off your head and eat you.'

"Now that that's over, let me tell you what I'm really like"

'You can't just nod. You have to say, I do. Good Lord. Are all mimes this annoying, or is it just you?'

'If someone objects to this union, tweet now or forever hold your peace...'

"I'm afraid it's 'I do' ... not 'Undo'."

Groom decoration on wedding cake makes good his escape.

Witty T-Shirt Guy

When Female Leopards Marry.

Just married.

Google Translate for Marriagese

'Camilla, I don't mind you writing your own vows but you can't start 'Now Diana is dead...''

"And do you also promise to be LinkedIn for life, facebook friends forever and to stay off Tinder till you're burnt to a cinder?"

"....And are you willing to stand your mothers-in-laws' bleating until the divorce court do you apart?"

The climatic wedding scene from "I Married the Blob"

"Do you promise to love and be faithful to each other for the next 28 days and then see where it goes from there?"

"I knew they had shot gun weddings in the wild west, but not in Milton Keynes!"

Spark Notes Wedding Vows