Wedding Tradition Questioner Gifts

'-and stop saying 'who's carrying who over the threshold?''

This is forever... till death do us part...

'We've postponed the wedding until we come up with something we can do at the ceremony that will become a viral video.'

Bride is angry, as she notices that the groom figure on the cake is drunk.

"OK, so you've told us what God thinks... but now I'd like to know what YOU think!"

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

'Love and marriage?- I'm afraid I can't help you much with that, young fellow.'

"I don't want to be a king like Dad - I want to be a pirate like Grandpa!"

The wedding cake as Holy Sacrament.

"Actually, it's customary to say 'I do' to the groom, rather than text it."

"What happens to our soul if we're taxed out of existence."

Atheist United - A Non-Prophet Organization

Thanksgiving in Antarctica.

Winery: Employees Must Wash Feet Before Returning to Work.

"And so, by the ventriloquism powers vested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife."

"Until the weapons of mass destruction are found."

Croquembouche.

"Ah, how romantic. They're kissing under my missing toe."

Bride and groom cellists

"I understand they're a rather mature couple?"

Cheese rolling

"So what if Jesus was sent here to suffer and die... We all do that."

"Looks like Father's done a bunk."

"This is what he would have wanted - he was a total neat freak."

On the eighth day God created blasphemy.

Confetti Recycling.

Door-to-Door Agnostic

"Do you, Thomas, promise to pay attention for the first year and phone it in for the rest of your life?"

I have not lowered my standards...I've just set more realistic goals...'

In God We Trust...Because We Can't Trust our Politicians.

Hernia clinic: 'You either have to quit getting married, or quit carrying your new bride over the threshold!'

"Of course religious leaders are frauds. Try putting a check that is payable to 'God' in a church's collection plate and see what happens."